I’ve just eaten my breakfast. I started the day with a vanilla yoghurt before an early morning trip to drop R at the bus stop, followed by my porridge with almond milk and a plum. I’m not feeling it. I’m still hungry and I want to make cookies. I know that I want to make them because I want to eat them, as much as I also want to make sure we have a dessert for tonight for the children. As always, there’s the back to school Sen regression going on, which although expected is still emotionally draining and I’ve spent far far too long daily since Tuesday either on the phone, writing emails or looking through old paperwork trying to put together a case for more support.

When I spend so long having phone calls and writing emails and just waiting to see what will happen and not getting started on shabbos cooking until later than planned, mindless eating happens. I stopped myself from eating more chocolate chips than I’d already had by making them into cookies. There’s got to be some logic there. I’m not sure what it is.

Anyway, tonight’s supper is made now with lots of veg – roast chicken (skin removed), onions, carrots, courgette, and tomatoes. I was also considering a bag of cauliflower but honestly, it’s enough without it.

I haven’t had lunch yet (apart from chocolate chips) and everyone’s due home imminently.

Tomorrow we are out for lunch, so I don’t know what the menu will be, but from what she mentioned she might make, it sounded pretty healthy.

Made myself a quick cream cheese and avocado sandwich (Y is now eating, and I have to factor in what he’ll eat with my meals – one more complicating factor! But obviously good that he continues to develop.

Followed by one of the cookies. Yum. Dark and chocolatey. Really hit the spot.

Thank you to FoodTrackingMomma for her helpful support as I was wavering earlier. I am tracking what I’m eating. It may not be the healthiest but tracking is the first step to identifying the issues and fixing them. As she recommended having “a glass of water and one piece of chocolate” it reminded me I’d barely drunk anything and I did (eventually) have a drink.

Fridays are always so hectic.

Good shabbos all